Nº. 1 of  7

SERVED WITH A SIDE OF SARCASM

SOPHISTICATED IGNORANCE

Posts tagged me:

Had to take a picture because otherwise who would notice this post?
Also, unintentional Lana Del Rey promo? As long as the saying Ms. Del Rey claims they’ve got down on the West Coast is, “Applying for jobs is soul-crushing,” because that’s what I’ve got going on now. And really that was the whole point of this post that you wouldn’t have otherwise read if my face wasn’t up there. Boom.

Had to take a picture because otherwise who would notice this post?

Also, unintentional Lana Del Rey promo? As long as the saying Ms. Del Rey claims they’ve got down on the West Coast is, “Applying for jobs is soul-crushing,” because that’s what I’ve got going on now. And really that was the whole point of this post that you wouldn’t have otherwise read if my face wasn’t up there. Boom.

Naughty by nature like I’m hip-hop hooray

Naughty by nature like I’m hip-hop hooray

Two thoughts I had today:
I take selfies at a rate better suited for a much more attractive person. Good for me for believing in myself like that.
I’m aging like cottage cheese someone left out on the counter overnight.

Two thoughts I had today:

  1. I take selfies at a rate better suited for a much more attractive person. Good for me for believing in myself like that.
  2. I’m aging like cottage cheese someone left out on the counter overnight.
Having an employee discount can lead to some questionable purchases

Having an employee discount can lead to some questionable purchases

Winter looks

Winter looks

My manager told me to smile more at work. Apparently my default face isn’t very welcoming? Will try to be less dead inside on Black Friday*



*lolasifbyeee

My manager told me to smile more at work. Apparently my default face isn’t very welcoming? Will try to be less dead inside on Black Friday*

*lolasifbyeee

Where does “grown man with a stuffed animal” rate on the creepiness scale?

(more like “ingrown man” AMIRITE?!!!!??) 

(Actually I don’t even know what that would mean)

Where does “grown man with a stuffed animal” rate on the creepiness scale?

(more like “ingrown man” AMIRITE?!!!!??)

(Actually I don’t even know what that would mean)

In an attempt to get me to pay attention to her, some girl soliciting donations said to me,

"I like your chest hair. It makes you look like a man." 

My inner attention whore (lol “inner” as if) loved the compliment, and I had to give her credit for realizing that my man cleavage is a desperate cry for attention… but not enough credit that I actually donated anything/bothered to learn what organization she was from/made eye contact with her.
I mean like, let’s get real, girl. I don’t leave half my shirt unbuttoned so that I can sponsor some kid in Africa, I do it so that someone will sponsor me out of having to work for a living.

In an attempt to get me to pay attention to her, some girl soliciting donations said to me,

"I like your chest hair. It makes you look like a man." 

My inner attention whore (lol “inner” as if) loved the compliment, and I had to give her credit for realizing that my man cleavage is a desperate cry for attention… but not enough credit that I actually donated anything/bothered to learn what organization she was from/made eye contact with her.

I mean like, let’s get real, girl. I don’t leave half my shirt unbuttoned so that I can sponsor some kid in Africa, I do it so that someone will sponsor me out of having to work for a living.

Reunited and it feels so good

Reunited and it feels so good

Family vacation but my mom probably doesn’t wanna be in this so I had to crop her out aren’t I a good son!?

Family vacation but my mom probably doesn’t wanna be in this so I had to crop her out aren’t I a good son!?

Nº. 1 of  7