Traveling companion (Taken with instagram)
I just watched W.E., and I can’t figure out what people hated about it so much. It was visually stunning, well-acted, and it made some interesting points about celebrities and relationships. I can’t figure out how this has a 12% rating on RottenTomatoes or how it was commercially ignored upon release. There are certainly a couple films that Madonna’s been involved in that deserve this amount of hate (Swept Away, anyone?), but not this one. W.E. isn’t the best movie you’ll ever see - it drags a little at times, and whenever characters from the past interact with the ones in the present it’s weird as fuck - but it’s certainly not the worst either. Definitely worth checking out, even if you put it on mute and just look at the scenery (and also the scenes with pugs in them).
The usual.
Are they legally allowed to call this “best of”?
Me to my mom at dinner last night, because I am a gem.
After being sick for 3 weeks, there’s nothing like the sweet embrace of an Instagram filter to make you look like a person again. (Taken with instagram)
I haven’t been able to pin down the overall style of Joe Jonas’ Instagram account like I was for Rihanna (that would be “tween prostitute,” FYI), but this photo is very “12 year old gets his first cell phone.”
I’ve always wanted to be the subject of a Missed Connection. I would never respond, because obviously those are all just people waiting to Black Dahlia you, but it would be nice to look at one and know it was for me. Gotta get validation somehow, right?
A former coworker of mine at Barnes & Noble used to get them all the time, and I was always jealous. What was I doing wrong? Probably judging all the gay customers, like the guy who wanted me to special order him a copy of Lauren Conrad’s latest book or the time I asked a guy who was buying Miley Cyrus’ autobiography if he needed a gift receipt… and when he said no I gave him the worst side-eye. But anyway, I was super jealous of my coworker, until I thought about it and realized he worked in the kids’ section, so… creepy.
Also, are we still doing jokes about racism on Girls? I would’ve thought that ended in April (although this one is still pretty solid).
This is the most “alive” I’ve seen Nicole Kidman look since, like, 2005. Admit it - we all thought she did the Stepford Wives remake to cover up for the fact that she had become a robot in real life.
Apparently in her new movie, The Paperboy, Nicole Kidman pees on Zac Efron. To be fair, it’s because he was stung by a jellyfish, but who cares about the “why” once you’ve read a sentence like that? Also, who cares about the “why” when the line preceding the golden shower is, “If anyone’s gonna pee on him, it’s gonna be me!”
According to Vulture, there’s also a scene where Zac Efron dances in the rain in his underwear, so clearly this is a film with something for everyone. Congratulations on picking the perfect follow-up to Precious, Lee Daniels. You have truly done Oprah proud.